by yoursl | Mar 5, 2015 | Dating/Relationships, Just For Fun, Sexual Discussion, Taboo Topics |
Last week, these news articles about sex made national headlines and created some conversational buzz. The North Carolina Ethics Commission publicly announced that it is “perfectly legal” for a lobbyist and a government official to have a sexual relationship with one another. The commission’s opinion, as reported in The Daily Beast, “essentially says that your body is a temple and sharing it with anyone else is a priceless gift.” The commission’s view that sex is “priceless” equates to “sex has no value.” Items of value need not be disclosed, according to the commission. In an editorial published by the Beaufort Observer, the paper denounced the commission’s opinion. “[S]ince the Ethics Commission has now ruled that sex has no value how will prostitution ever be prosecuted any more in this state? If sex has no value, how can prostitution be illegal?” the paper’s editorial argued. I prefer to think that the commission meant “having incalculable monetary, intellectual, or spiritual worth” or even “precious” as the meaning of “priceless.” In this regard, sex would indeed have value, even if we cannot describe that value in monetary terms. At the very least, a sexual relationship between a lobbyist and a government official should be considered unethical, a position that U.S. Senator Tom Tillis supports. In 2012, two of Tillis’ staff members due to relationships with lobbyists. Tillis, a Republican from North Carolina, enforced his personal policy of banning such behavior between lobbyists and members of his staff. “What these people are guilty of is very bad judgment,” Tillis said at the time of this staff members’ resignations. Since mid-December 2014,...
by yoursl | Feb 26, 2015 | Dating/Relationships, Just For Fun |
My partner Dutch and I were running errands in late January when Dutch asked me between stop lights if I would like flowers and a romantic dinner once a year on Valentine’s Day or if I would prefer to receive love and affection every single day. Seeing how Dutch shows affection for me by keeping the refrigerator stocked with Canadian bacon, I much prefer consistent affection over a once-a-year to-do. Dutch was struggling with the desire to NOT give me a Valentine’s Day gift because of personal dislike for what Dutch describes as “an overly commercial holiday that gives people a pass on showing love and affection the rest of the year.” Dutch’s friends predicted not giving me a gift would be relationship suicide. I am pleased to say those predictions were false. Dutch is just part of the 66 percent of American adults who believe “the consumerism of the holiday has ruined the romance,” as discovered by a recent Harris Poll of 2,232 American adults surveyed online between January 14 and 19. This poll revealed that 68 percent of American adults “view the time-honored tradition of Valentine’s Day marriage proposals as cliché” with 48 percent of American adults seeing “Valentine’s Day as an opportunity to communicate more with their significant other.” Let’s pause for a moment. Are the other 364 days of the year not “an opportunity to communicate more” with a significant other? Dutch and I communicate every day, be it via facebook, email, text messaging, phone calls or in-person conversations. We listen to National Public Radio in the car while running errands and talk about the...
by yoursl | Feb 12, 2015 | Dating/Relationships, Just For Fun |
I can admit that I went on 32 first dates in the 16 months before I met my partner, Dutch. Thirty-two first dates is a great deal of work. There were times when I had to do some fancy footwork to avoid an awkward, unwelcome kiss and when I had to dig deep into my patience reserve to stop myself from screaming, “STOP TALKING! You are being such an ass!” or “Keep your hands to yourself!” For my search for a mate, I utilized online dating. Where else was I going to meet someone upscale, intelligent and successful? Definitely not at my local laundry mat or grocery store and certainly not at work. I didn’t want to meet anyone exactly like me, who is just beginning to get life figured out. I wanted to meet someone with some life experience who could show me remarkable and amazing stuff that was still unknown to me. Online dating taught me some important life lessons during my search for a mate. I want to share some of those lessons in this blog. Honesty really is the best policy. Users of online dating forums fill out questionnaires about their physical appearance and personal likes and dislikes. I checked that I like “sci-fi” thinking that meant the Star Trek character Captain Piccard or the card game Magic. After a long day at work, I went out on a date and fell asleep watching the 50th episode of Dr. Who with an overly enthusiastic Dr. Who fan and was dumped the very next day. Apparently, the Devil really is in the details. I probably should...
by yoursl | Feb 5, 2015 | Dating/Relationships, Sexual Discussion, Taboo Topics |
On the night of June 23, 2013, a 21-year-old female Vanderbilt University student was drinking at a local bar. Her boyfriend of just a few weeks, Brandon Vandenburg, who was a football player at the college, had given her a blue drink, which was laced with a date-rape drug. This female student doesn’t remember anything between drinking the blue drink at the bar and waking up in an unfamiliar room at 8 something the next morning. Several people stood by and watched while Vandenburg, who was driving the victim around Nashville in her own Mercedes-Benz, pulled the unconscious woman from the vehicle and he and three of his teammates, Cory Batey, Brandon Banks and Jaborian McKenzie, dragged and carried her into Gillette House, into the elevator and then down a hallway to Vandenburg’s room. Sadly, this young woman was victimized, sexually assaulted, and raped for 30 minutes in Vandenburg’s dorm room while she was unconscious. According to court testimony, as published by several media outlets, Vandenburg dragged the young woman out of an elevator, dumped her on the floor and took several photographs of the unconscious woman. He and one of the players carried the young woman to Vandenberg’s dorm room and, within minutes, Batey began sexually assaulting the woman with his fingers. One of the men penetrated the woman’s anus with a water bottle while Vandenburg cheered on his fellow teammates with lewd comments and, as testimony proved, handed out condoms to the other players, slapped the woman’s buttocks, and claimed he could not have sex with her because he could not get an erection. Vandenburg filmed the...
by yoursl | Jan 22, 2015 | Dating/Relationships, Taboo Topics |
The hours of cold darkness are getting shorter, and, before we know it, grey winter will give way to colorful spring. This time of renewal and rebirth is an excellent opportunity to meet new people. There are online sites for people seeking friendship, friends with benefits, short- and long-term relationships and play partners in certain types of relationships. This blog is devoted to just a sampling of these sites with information about how to use a few sites. Meetup.com is like the five-and-dime variety stores of by-gone years. There really is something for everyone at this site as its purpose is to connect individuals with like-minded others at in-person events. After creating an account, users search for their interests in an area near them, i.e. beer brewing in Indianapolis, and the site suggests groups that match users’ interests, such as “Indy Beer Lovers.” Once a user joins a group and RSVP’s for an event, he or she simply attends the event and meets other people within the group. With Meetup, if a user finds a group is not really to his or her liking, he or she can simply leave that group with no questions asked. There is no limit to the number of groups a user can join, and most of the groups are free to join. Users should expect to pay admission fees or other costs to attend some group events. There are dozens of online dating sites in existence. Your Sexy Librarian personally knows several people who have met their significant others on OkCupid.com. This is a free website with optional paid extras that allows a...
by yoursl | Dec 4, 2014 | Bedroom Fun, Dating/Relationships, Just For Fun, Sexual Discussion |
A collage featuring several of the gift ideas in the blog below. The winter holidays are fast approaching. If you need gift ideas with jingle and va va voom, Your Sexy Librarian recommends the following items be stowed under some mistletoe. PrimO Tux Vibe Ring is a premium silicone penis ring from The Screaming O. With features such as 3 vibration speeds and a pulse setting, this little dynamo is sure to please. The ring is latex- and phthalate-free, reusable, waterproof and wireless. The battery has 45-minute life and can be easily replaced. The retail price is between $19.95 and $24.95. Purchase online at The Screaming O or at Lover’s Lane. Cards Against Humanity™ is “a party game for horrible people” and makes a great gift for those with a sense of humor. Warning: the uber-conservative and the easily offended may not enjoy playing this game. The card deck is separated into black question cards and white answer cards. Each player takes turns pulling a question card from the deck. The other players then place an answer card face-down on the table. The player with the question card reads aloud each answer card, and this is where the fun begins. In case you have never played Cards Against Humanity™, this game drips with as much sexual innuendo as you can tolerate, has been known to cause players to laugh non-stop for several hours and can be played with really cool parents. The retail price is $25 for the starter pack with 460 answer cards and 90 question cards and $10 for each 100-card expansion pack. Buy online from the...
