by yoursl | Mar 19, 2015 | Just For Fun, Men's Sexual Health, Sexual Discussion, Women's Sexual Health |
I was that child who asked “Why is the sky blue?” until I was satisfied with the answer I was given. My mother quickly adapted to my questions; she bought my brother and me a set of encyclopedias and a “how science works” book series along with two dictionaries. She gave us both unlimited access to the public library and encouraged me to bestow some questions on the librarians. We were both encouraged to read anything we wanted, no matter how challenging the material or how questionable in nature the material was deemed by other mothers. Our mother never stifled our creativity, intelligence or curiosity. Perhaps this is why I still ask questions to this day. I want to know as much as I can about everything that interests me, which is one reason I spend more time reading and researching than watching television. The other day I was reading a book for some ideas for some Tweets and found information that excited me. I discovered a treasure trove of anatomy-related information about sex and reproduction. I want to share this information because it is just good stuff to know. The Italian anatomist Gabriel Fallopius was born in 1523 in Modena, Italy, and served as a canon of the cathedral of Modena before returning to the study of medicine. In 1549, Fallopius became a professor of anatomy at the University of Pisa. He performed multitudes of dissections using human cadavers and described his work in the book Observationes anatomicae, which was published in 1561. Fallopius described many of the major nerves of the head and face as well as...
by yoursl | Mar 5, 2015 | Dating/Relationships, Just For Fun, Sexual Discussion, Taboo Topics |
Last week, these news articles about sex made national headlines and created some conversational buzz. The North Carolina Ethics Commission publicly announced that it is “perfectly legal” for a lobbyist and a government official to have a sexual relationship with one another. The commission’s opinion, as reported in The Daily Beast, “essentially says that your body is a temple and sharing it with anyone else is a priceless gift.” The commission’s view that sex is “priceless” equates to “sex has no value.” Items of value need not be disclosed, according to the commission. In an editorial published by the Beaufort Observer, the paper denounced the commission’s opinion. “[S]ince the Ethics Commission has now ruled that sex has no value how will prostitution ever be prosecuted any more in this state? If sex has no value, how can prostitution be illegal?” the paper’s editorial argued. I prefer to think that the commission meant “having incalculable monetary, intellectual, or spiritual worth” or even “precious” as the meaning of “priceless.” In this regard, sex would indeed have value, even if we cannot describe that value in monetary terms. At the very least, a sexual relationship between a lobbyist and a government official should be considered unethical, a position that U.S. Senator Tom Tillis supports. In 2012, two of Tillis’ staff members due to relationships with lobbyists. Tillis, a Republican from North Carolina, enforced his personal policy of banning such behavior between lobbyists and members of his staff. “What these people are guilty of is very bad judgment,” Tillis said at the time of this staff members’ resignations. Since mid-December 2014,...
by yoursl | Feb 26, 2015 | Dating/Relationships, Just For Fun |
My partner Dutch and I were running errands in late January when Dutch asked me between stop lights if I would like flowers and a romantic dinner once a year on Valentine’s Day or if I would prefer to receive love and affection every single day. Seeing how Dutch shows affection for me by keeping the refrigerator stocked with Canadian bacon, I much prefer consistent affection over a once-a-year to-do. Dutch was struggling with the desire to NOT give me a Valentine’s Day gift because of personal dislike for what Dutch describes as “an overly commercial holiday that gives people a pass on showing love and affection the rest of the year.” Dutch’s friends predicted not giving me a gift would be relationship suicide. I am pleased to say those predictions were false. Dutch is just part of the 66 percent of American adults who believe “the consumerism of the holiday has ruined the romance,” as discovered by a recent Harris Poll of 2,232 American adults surveyed online between January 14 and 19. This poll revealed that 68 percent of American adults “view the time-honored tradition of Valentine’s Day marriage proposals as cliché” with 48 percent of American adults seeing “Valentine’s Day as an opportunity to communicate more with their significant other.” Let’s pause for a moment. Are the other 364 days of the year not “an opportunity to communicate more” with a significant other? Dutch and I communicate every day, be it via facebook, email, text messaging, phone calls or in-person conversations. We listen to National Public Radio in the car while running errands and talk about the...
by yoursl | Feb 19, 2015 | Just For Fun, Taboo Topics |
Last week, I had the nervous pleasure of giving a four-minute inspirational talk to around 167 people at a networking event. I began to work on my speech in October, shortly after I was asked to present. I chose a topic that I felt would resonate with the majority of the audience and that would allow me to inject some humor into the speech as this was the first time I would be speaking to more than 10 people at once. I talked about life lessons learned from online dating. Or, rather I tried to talk about this topic, as the technical difficulties of a non-working microphone left me shouting at all those people. I wrapped my four-minute speech up at 3 minutes and 15 seconds because shouting is simply not my thing. Neither is sexism and dealing with double standards, which are two things most women in American cannot seem to shake. An hour prior to my inspirational talk, I met with the founder of the networking group during an audio-visual check. The 10-minute speaker, a woman, was there with me on stage. We were dressed in the same professional manner, except our choices in footwear. The other four-minute speaker was a male and running late to the sound check. The founder of the group questioned my choice in footwear, which that day was a pair of pink Adidas. February in the Midwest is generally a miserable cold. That night the weather was frigid, with gusts of wind and freezing rain. I wanted to wear my Adidas so I did not get frost-bitten toes from my open-toed heels...
by yoursl | Feb 12, 2015 | Dating/Relationships, Just For Fun |
I can admit that I went on 32 first dates in the 16 months before I met my partner, Dutch. Thirty-two first dates is a great deal of work. There were times when I had to do some fancy footwork to avoid an awkward, unwelcome kiss and when I had to dig deep into my patience reserve to stop myself from screaming, “STOP TALKING! You are being such an ass!” or “Keep your hands to yourself!” For my search for a mate, I utilized online dating. Where else was I going to meet someone upscale, intelligent and successful? Definitely not at my local laundry mat or grocery store and certainly not at work. I didn’t want to meet anyone exactly like me, who is just beginning to get life figured out. I wanted to meet someone with some life experience who could show me remarkable and amazing stuff that was still unknown to me. Online dating taught me some important life lessons during my search for a mate. I want to share some of those lessons in this blog. Honesty really is the best policy. Users of online dating forums fill out questionnaires about their physical appearance and personal likes and dislikes. I checked that I like “sci-fi” thinking that meant the Star Trek character Captain Piccard or the card game Magic. After a long day at work, I went out on a date and fell asleep watching the 50th episode of Dr. Who with an overly enthusiastic Dr. Who fan and was dumped the very next day. Apparently, the Devil really is in the details. I probably should...
by yoursl | Jan 29, 2015 | Just For Fun, Taboo Topics |
People often ask me how I find topics to write about for Your Sexy Librarian™ blog posts. The answer is very simple as I am inspired by everyday life. My partner, my brother and my closest friends will often email or text me various links to sex- or taboo-related internet posts they think will interest me. Friends flood my facebook account with an incredible amount of sex-related chatter; my suggested feeds are mostly all about sex now. Even my mother will jot down something she saw or read about that she thinks would make a good subject for me to research. I scan news tickers on television news programs, tune in to health-related broadcasts, read newspaper articles and books about sexual health and sexual issues and scan pharmaceutical literature (required reading for my day job) for ideas as well. Morning radio shows provide me with little blog gems from time to time. I love using Google for idea-gathering as well. Other people, oftentimes newly introduced to me, are a wealth of ideas. At networking events, after people find out what I write about, they sometimes whisper things like, “I’m poly.” or “I married a transgender man.” or “I struggle with an eating disorder.” This week’s blog is all about a recent Saturday night my partner and I shared with some of our closest friends. We hosted our first party together as a couple, which was a pivotal moment in our relationship as it was the first time we introduced our individual friends to each other. We carefully selected the party guests, debating whom would blend together nicely while making...
